Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater? Five Signs to Help You Know

November 1st, 2008 No Comments   Posted in Cheating

So you’ve been cheated on. It was devastating–like being kicked in the gut and thrown into the gutter. You couldn’t eat or function at work. Or maybe you were up all night watching old movies, crying and eating pints of Ben & Jerry’s. The affair creates such heartache and pain that you do not want it to happen again. Definitely never again.

The questions loom large. Is the cheater going to cheat again? It’s a big issue. Should you trust again or not? Is it true, “Once a cheater, always a cheater”? You may feel torn, like you want to take your cheating partner back but feel like it is a point of pride not to. You think, maybe you should just dive into that online pool, start looking for some great profiles and forget all about it. Or maybe not.

Well, I have some critical information for you: Research studies show that even among married couples, cheating is relatively common: about 22% of men and 13% of women cheat. According to recent studies, even spouses who describe themselves as “happy” with their marriage have affairs.

But the good news is this: Many people who are in relationships that have decent chemistry and benefits for both partners can actually work through the crisis of affairs. Not only that, they can become closer and put an end to cheating once and for all. This means that, “Once a cheater, always a cheater” is just not true. There are people who learn and grow from the painful emotional hurricane and the loss of closeness in the relationship that are the aftermaths of cheating.

Of course there are players or sex addicts that will cheat and cheat and cheat again. These are the ones your truly have to watch out for. How do you tell if you are dealing with a chronic cheater? Here are five signs that indicate your cheater is not a chronic case and that the relationship still has hope:

1. Your partner is truly remorseful and regrets having cheated. Look for heartfelt apologies that ring true when you hear them.

2. Your partner cuts off contact with his or her lover.

3. The cheater shows a renewed appreciation and devotion towards you.

4. You wind up having deep, open and honest conversations with each other about your relationship, what was missing in it and where you’d like to take it in the future.

5. Your partner wants to enter psychotherapy or counseling either individually or with you to understand his/her own dynamics and to make your relationship better and more intimate.

If the cheater shows these signs and the relationship is good for you in many ways, consider taking your partner back. One caveat: If your partner continues the affair or starts a new one, in spite of showing the above signs, you may be dealing with a player or a sex addict.

And just how do you know if the cheating is going on again? Here are some common signs:

• he/she’s working late a lot

• he/she’s’s suddenly taking trips you can’t go on

• he/she’s got new hobbies that don’t include you

• mysterious phone calls with hang-ups

• credit card bills for unexplained hotel stays or gift-type items

• less sex

• he/she’s more distant, angry or picky

If you find out your partner is cheating again, it’s time to protect yourself from any further heartbreak by breaking up with this person. There are wonderful new matches waiting right there on your computer screen!

In sum, if your partner strays, it doesn’t absolutely mean he or she will do it again. Once a cheater, always a cheater isn’t necessarily true. Forgiveness and a new coming together are possible. If you have been betrayed but want to see if it can work, just stay heads up for a while and see which way the train is heading!

You can read about the latest research on cheating and keeping passion and love alive in your relationship in my new book , Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love.

Psychologist, Dr. Diana Kirschner, appeared on Oprah and is a frequent guest on the Today Show. For 25+ years she has helped thousands of single women find love. Her acclaimed new book is Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love. For her etips, blog, dating articles, daily affirmations & discussion forum visit http://www.lovein90days.com

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Married But Dating Personal Ad Sites- Is Your Spouse Cheating?

October 17th, 2008 No Comments   Posted in Cheating

Did you know there are married personal ad web sites? These married personals are online dating services that cater to married men and women that want to cheat on their spouse. But they also attract singles that want to date married women or married men. Some single people find it especially sexually exciting to be with a partner that is married.

A single man may find it a turn on to sleep with a married woman because he is dominating her husband or it makes him feel extra masculine to be able to seduce a married woman.

On the other hand a single woman may want to seduce a married man because it makes her feel more desirable to think that a man could be “stolen” away from his wife. It’s more of a challenge to the single woman to steal a man that’s taken.

Many people have the philosophy that anything goes between consenting adults. If that’s how you feel that’s fine but in many cases these married men and women have a loving caring spouse at home that has no idea that their spouse is using a “married but dating” web site looking to have an online affair.

Is your spouse on a Married Personals site?

There are a few steps you can take to look into this growing trend and put your mind at ease.

1. You should know all of your spouses email addresses

2. You should ask your spouse if they have any secret email accounts, secret social network pages or personal web pages.

3. You should check the browser history files on the family computer to see what sites your spouse has visited.

4. You should hire a professional to locate any secret email accounts your spouse may have

5. Hire a professional to find out which dating services those emails are registered on.

There are solutions to this concern and no one should live in fear or uncertainty about their relationship and the future of there family.

There are online investigators that specialize in investigations just like these . For instance you can perform an online infidelity investigation and find out which sites your spouse is visiting. If you believe they have a secret email account that also can be revealed by an investigator that has experience in cyber investigations.

These kinds of services are offered online and are very inexpensive,. You can retain an investigator as quickly as you would buy a bag on Ebay and your results come via email. A lot faster than UPS would deliver that purse. It’s probably a lot less expensive that a purse also.

But you have to stop and think of priorities. What is more important ? The latest fashion statement or the safety and security of your family.

If you are the kind of person that has never heard on Married Personals sites then you are probably at the greatest risk to this kind of betrayal. If you never suspected it you probably never noticed any of the clues that have been right under your nose.

Ed Opperman invites you to visit his cyber investigation website for all of your email search needs. He offers cyber stalking investigations , internet infidelity investigations, reverse email trace, and can locate secret email accounts. To learn more please click here now:===> http://www.emailrevealer.com

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Cheating Signs - How Can You Tell?

October 16th, 2008 No Comments   Posted in Cheating

Few things are as abominable as a deceitful lover. The very thought that one’s sweetheart may not be perfectly faithful is enough to keep us up at night. Does she have secret rendezvous with another man? Is he cheating on you? Such questions plague us no end. Numerous ladies are saddled with unfaithful spouses or boyfriends. Often women think it in their minds but cannot come to a definite conclusion. At times women end up charging their lovers wrongly. This can be disconcerting but there are signs which will let you know for sure if your man is indeed straying and for this you need not exert yourself too much.

Men display very many signs which show if they are straying. A major indicator of a disloyal lover is in the emotional displays made by such a man. But it is not easy to understand or unravel emotional signals since these are very elusive and faint, especially in men. And one needs to have confirmation before they can absolutely believe these. In any case, dealing with feelings has never been an easy task. Feelings are difficult to define and subject to much change. Over-charged emotions may lead us to false conclusions and we end up acting unusually. Openly expressed feelings may also give away your secret. All this notwithstanding, emotional responses are still the best way of judging for yourself the infidelity of your lover.

Here are some ways to unravel the mysteries about what emotions inspires which action in your beloved. Undoubtedly, an unfaithful lover experiences a varied spectrum of many emotions, out of which a guilty conscience most certainly forms a major part, despite whatever enjoyment he may feel from this new ‘attachment’. Even though starting an affair may make the person in question feel a certain enjoyment their conscience tells them their behaviour is not right. These powerful emotions when combined will be visible in his unusual conduct and you will certainly notice him behaving in a way that is odd and uncharacteristic.

Let me list for you certain traits that you will surely see in your lover if they are actually cheating:

1. His phone bill has a new number listed on it and the data shows that the number is frequently called every day. When you call this number a woman’s voice is heard on the other end.

2. Many times in a day when you pick up calls on his mobile or land line someone hangs up at the other end.

3. He isn’t as interested in sex as he used to be.

4. He makes alterations in the way he dresses and won’t explain why.

5. When you take his clothes for a laundry wash you come across little slips of paper bearing unknown numbers.

6. He doesn’t hang out with you as much as he used to and prefers to spend more time with his guy friends or even ‘working late’.

7. He acts erratic and charges you with disloyalty, all the time acting jealously.

8. You can smell a woman’s perfume on him on the several evenings that he returns home late. It is the same perfume each time.

9. Every time he picks up the phone goes out of the room and speaks very softly into the phone. When you ask him who it was he says it was a call related to work.

10. He makes sudden phone calls to you and tries to find out if you have made plans to venture out later with your family or your friends.

Despite all of the above mentioned you must ask your lover if he is actually being unfaithful to you or having an affair with another. When confronted with this question his reaction will make the answer all too clear to you. A cowardly person will not scruple to lie though. You must observe his facial expressions very closely therefore which will certainly give him away.

While ending a relationship can be sad it is necessary for you to separate from a partner who is not faithful. It is much better if you come to know the hard facts at the earliest possible time. A bond which the other person does not honour is a bogus one and will only make you miserable. Only by breaking away from it can you begin life afresh. At no point are you to blame yourself since a cheating nature can never be satisfied with any one woman and this vicious cycle will probably continue for the man in question.

Keith Ward is the Founder and Director of the Circle of Professional Clairvoyants, which offers Psychic Readings with fully qualified Senior UK Clairvoyants and Psychics.

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